Even though it may be the best decision for your family, divorce can still be stressful and emotional for everyone involved.
Children often have a hard time processing the new family dynamic and adjusting to the fact that their parents no longer live together.
Keep your kids out of your arguments
Children may not understand the reasons for your divorce. Once you are no longer living with your ex, make an effort to keep arguments with them away from your children. Do not use your children as messengers or as sources of information. Do not add to the confusion and stress your children are already coping with.
Show up when expected
Be someone your children can depend on. Show up for all custody exchanges when expected. Show up to support your kids in extracurricular events and sports. Make it clear to your children that even though you may not live together all the time, they can still count on you to be there when they need you.
Find support for yourself
Find an outlet where you can vent and talk through your frustrations about your ex, the divorce and the changes in your life. This may be a group of friends you can depend on, a traditional support group or a therapist. Your children should not be your sounding board for your grown-up feelings and troubles.
Communicate with your children and encourage them to talk about their feelings. Talk with your kids openly, validate their feelings and make sure they understand they are not responsible for what happened. If they struggle to adjust, consider seeking help from a counselor.
